You know you're from Poznań when:


- you can use "tej" in a sentence but have trobule explaining its function to others

- you might owe somebody a mere 20gr and you will still remember to give it back to them

- you have never really seen Koziołki in action

- you think Stary Browar rules all

- you know what "szneka z glancem" is but never really call it that

- you wonder if people will ever realize that we don't actually speak a dialect

- you think that buses and trams in other cities look odd because they are not painted yellow&green

- you think yellow&green should be the only legal colors to paint buses and trams in

- you have at least once been thrown out of Pestka, in the middle of the overpass, because it broke down

- you know how the name Pestka originated

- you got drunk when they finally finished building Pestka after 20yrs of "construction work"

- you think "ostrzytko" and "skibka" are legitimate words

- you know that Poznań was once the capital of Poland

- you thought Malta Ski was an awsome idea because it was like having mountains in the middle of the city

- you twisted your wrist/finger/ankle skiing at Malta Ski and no longer think it's an awsome idea

- you feel very patriotic about Lech beer but never really drink it because Żywiec is just so much better

- you know that PO on somebody's license plate doesn't really mean they are a supporter of the Civic Platform

- you consider those round tram number plates simply adorable

- you can jump on a train and be in Berlin in a little over 2hrs

- you call Półwiejska street by its proper name - Deptak

- you have often wondered what Kaponiera means but never really figured it out

- you love meeting people from Cracow because you know an excellent conversation starter - oh, you say "na pole"? we say "na dwór", how funny is that?!

- you get asked by people from all over Poland to have mercy and bring them rogale marcińskie if you happen to go home around the 11th of November

- you don't think the word "pyry" is funny or weird

- you make "pyry z gzikiem" when you have no idea what to have for lunch

- you're very proud of your city because it is one of those four in Poland, that have a highway coming in and out of them

- you went sleighing in Teatralka when you were a kid

- you used to meet your friends at Teatralka when you were in high school

- you think zapiekanki from Teatralka are unbeatable

- you loved reading "Jeżycjada" because you knew where all the places were

- you know that Powstanie Wielkopolskie was the only successful uprising in Poland's history, while others may not even know it happened in the first place

- you went to Biskupin on a school trip and thought it was really boring

- you went on too many school trips to Kórnik and are tired of the Biała Dama story

- you know the difference between kurnik and Kórnik, and can spell both

- you think Warta is pretty damn wide

- you hate walking all the way from Stary Rynek to Kaponiera to catch a night bus (but you'll think twice before getting a cab... as you don't want to disappoint those who think we're stingy ;)

- you know it's not a good idea to be driving on Niestachowska street during rush hours

- you know the saga of the Kulczyk family

- you can't get over those hideous modern buildings in the middle of Stary Rynek

- you consider zoo smell in the middle of the city a perfectly normal thing

- you know that when you walk along Wierzbięcice you need to watch out for dog shit

- you know that Eskulap, Esku and SQ are the same trademark

- you think that going to Bema is really embarassing but you've been there at least once

- you know multiple Piotrs and Pawełs

- you feel like the whole country owes us for the Piotr&Paweł chain

- you know the name of the university is supposed to be pronounced [u.a.m], and flip out when others make it into [ułam]

- you comprehend the ugly gap in the facade of Kupiec Poznański but still can't get over it

- you consider the question "how are things in Pyrlandia?" oh-so- lame

- you turn off the light when you leave a room (not because you're trying to save the planet but because you suspect it might have sthg to do with the amount on your electric bill)

- you know that Malta isn't just an island in the Mediterranean

- you kind of miss it when you're away :)


And thanks to kind suggestions:

- you enjoy saying "wuchta wiary" and getting that wtf? reaction from people who have no idea what you mean

- at some point in your life, you were thrown out of the lawn in front of the Opera House

- you've been to Jarmark Świętojański at least once

- you call a stick figure "pamperek" instead of "ludzik" just to see confusion on ppl's faces

- you feel strangely prejudiced against the word "policja", a version of which is used by all the other civilized, European nations to desribe law enforcement officers. you'd rather call them "szkieły"

- you might occassionally ask ppl if they have hay on them. note: they won't know you mean money

- you have trouble masterng the "trz" sound, therefore "trzy" is just "czy"

- you keep wondering why Okrąglak still hasn't been added to the UNESCO World Heritage List

- you know you don't have to travel to Paris to go to Place Pigalle

- you know that Multikino was Poland's first multipex and you're damn proud of it! and Cinema City Franowo will always be Kinepolis (the biggest movie theater in Europe btw - Poznań represent! ;)

- you get annoyed when you order pyzy outside of Wlkp. and get those small Silesian nuddles instead of the real thing

- you use the word "ostrzytko" instead of "temperówka", and, as if it wasn't bad enough, you pronounce it "oszczytko". how are you ever going to sharpen that pencil?! ;)

- you go thorugh life without realizing that "odbić bilet", "nadusić przycisk", "zakluczyć drzwi", and "tam do góry" are not utterances in proper Polish

- you know that "wyje bana w hujkach" isn't a profanity

- your bread gets cut into "skibki" and it also has little heels on both ends :)

- you know that Satan lives in Wilda

- you refer to Santa Claus as Gwiazdor because ... well, dunno really, Santa is so generic? ;)

- you know that snappy dressers live in Mosina, while dorks inhabit Gądki

- as stated before, you do not speak a dialect. however, you do use a whole bunch of outlandish words, such as: klamerka, ćmiki, wihajster, dynks, tytka, klunkry, klamoty, szlauch, fyrtel, kejter